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This Thanksgiving will be different for everyone. Whether you're going to a small, socially distanced gathering or doing things virtually, this year’s holiday will be a first for everyone.However, there is one constant: uncomfortable conversations.The old adage is to not talk about religion, politics and finances as they are bound to be personal or create polarizing views that could put a rift between family members.This year has given no shortage of things to disagree on. Politics, the pandemic, racial justice, they all produce very strong opinions that can be on very different sides of the topic and elicit emotional responses. But whether you’re around a table or giving thanks over Zoom, these heavy topics can be talked about without ruining the holiday.“I think that for a lot of people, Thanksgiving is going to come with an extra layer of anxiety,” said Deanna Singh, Chief Change Agent for Uplifting Impact. “There are so many things we don’t have answers for. Internal conflicts, external conflicts, this year will come with an extra layer of anxiety but also hope it comes with an extra level of Thanksgiving.”Anxiety and stress are at all-time highs. The American Psychological Association says 60% of Americans are overwhelmed by the number of issues facing the United States right now and Generation Z, those who are 18 to 23 years old, are the most stressed. Roughly 1 in 3 people in the group report their mental health is worse than the same time last year.Singh says because of that, it’s important to recognize what you have to be thankful for this Thursday."We’ve been through a lot this year,” Singh said. “So, to be able to come together around the table and enjoy the people we love, I hope it comes with this extra layer of, ‘Wow. Let’s not take this for granted.’ This is big stuff.”The hot topic conversations also present the highest stress level for people. Eight out of ten people say the pandemic is a source of significant stress in their lives. Before the election, 68% of adults said they were stressed about it. That's up from 52% in 2016. Racial topics also bring about more stress with 59% of people saying police violence against minorities is a significant source of stress in their lives.It doesn’t mean you should avoid those “tough to talk about” topics altogether. There has been tremendous progress made on the racial justice front this year. After the killing of George Floyd, millions of people across the globe stood up against police brutality. It’s created a conversation on standing up for African Americans and being an ally.Around the dinner table, it may feel like an opportunity to share this newfound urge to stand up for racial equity. Singh says, it can be, if done appropriately so it has the most impact.She has three tips to have the most productive outcome from a tough conversation.Above all else, she says you need to check your own agenda before starting the conversation.“Understand what you are coming to the table with and what your purest intentions are,” Singh said. “It’s important to know what your agenda is and make sure your agenda isn’t like an, ‘I got you and I’m going to prove I’m the right person.’ I have never ever seen a conversation that starts with an agenda of, ‘I got you.’ If anything, it raises defenses.”It’s important to remember, as dug in as you are about your viewpoint and however correct you feel on the topic, someone else feels the exact same way about their own viewpoint. In order to be productive, Singh says it takes time to listen.“There are people with different views,” Singh said. “What an amazing opportunity to go to people you trust and love and try to expand your own thinking. Try and see things from a different perspective. I think it’s an amazing opportunity to learn.”Singh says it’s important to go into a conversation like this assuming your own opinion is wrong. It will help you gain empathy to someone else’s view and understand how you can explain your own view better.“It’s a humbling thing to think about, wow, I could be wrong,” Singh said. “No matter how vehemently you feel, start from that premise. That could allow for you to think about how to get to a conclusion or the space you want to move your audience to in a much more effective way. I have to be open to the fact that my ideology has holes in it. I will never convince somebody if I don’t understand them.”In order to be effective, it’s important to think about how you go about explaining your viewpoint. Singh says people have a tendency to explain their views in a way that makes sense to them but that could be counterproductive.“When people want to have difficult conversations, the way they prepare is the way they would want to receive the information and not in a way that’s best for the person they’re trying to have the conversation with,” Singh said. “Some people want facts or numbers and they need to see things on an Excel document and that’s how they make decisions. Other people really understand through stories or experiences. If you are going to wade into the water with people of differing opinions, one thing to prepare is to think about how they receive information and what’s the most effective for them.”Singh’s third tip is to be intentional. When it comes to politics, racial justice or how the pandemic is being handled, it can be easy to let your emotions get the best of you. She urges people to be able to address when something like that happens and acknowledge your interest in having a conversation.“Right now, I want to talk about how great the dressing is and this turkey and who made the mac n’ cheese?” Singh said. “Have that conversation when it’s appropriate. Let’s figure out a time when it would make more sense to have a conversation. There are certain spaces and places that are good for these conversations and you should do that. There are also certain places and spaces that are not.”By reeling in emotional responses, it can keep the conversation under control and prevent pushing loved ones farther apart.“One of the big things for me, I like to say I feel very uncomfortable right now,” Singh said. “I’m really, really emotional about what you said. I do not think I’m in a position to handle emotions that is respectful of you and respectful of me. I’m going to stop. I’m going to stop participating in this right now.”In order to de-escalate, Singh says it’s best to clarify what someone may have said. Asking, “What do you mean by that?” or “Can you tell me your reasoning behind that?” can be disarming ways to continue the conversation and help cooler heads prevail.Ultimately, ‘not talking about it’ may be less of an option now than ever before and Singh says that’s OK.“I would say this is a perfect opportunity for you to wade into those spaces if you’re feeling comfortable and feeling that calling,” Singh said. “It’s ok to do that. I would think carefully about where and how you do it. If you make a big scene of something and someone is already feeling defensive, what’s going to happen? More than likely, no matter how amazing they are as a person, they’re probably going to double down.”Singh has many other tips she is sharing in a webinar on How to be an Ally. Uplifting Impact is hosting the virtual webinar between Feb. 1 and Feb. 3. There is more information on the Uplifting Impact website.This story was originally published by Shaun Gallagher at WTMJ. 7424

This LeBron James card just sold at @GoldinAuctions for .8 million, the record for a modern day card. Winner is @LeoreAvidar, who says purchase is part of strategy to “bring something big to the collectibles and alternative asset business in the coming months.” pic.twitter.com/rN9lepvVpE— Darren Rovell (@darrenrovell) July 19, 2020 343

There's a new program aimed at helping Black and Latinx students succeed.The Equity in Education Initiative was built through a partnership between Walmart and North Carolina A&T State University.The program acknowledges many of these students start at a disadvantage, because they go through under-funded school districts.“These students are coming in sometimes with academic gaps that are due to no fault of their own. It's not a difference in ability, it's just a difference in their zip code,” said Kevin James, Dean of the Deese College of Business and Economics at North Carolina A&T.The program is broken up into four focus areas, addressing specific needs of different students. They include financial resources and mentorship while in school, and then network building to create career opportunities their white counterparts may already have.“So many people actually obtain their jobs through networks, because they know someone who knows someone, and many of these students, most of them come in without those built in networks and their families don't have those networks,” said James.The hope is that the positive effects of the program will extend outside of school, allowing successful students to invest and give back.“It's not just about the impact on the student. It's about multi-generational impact on families and about extending those impacts into communities that often times have been under resourced,” said James.Some parts of the program, like the Black Male Initiative, will make resources automatically available to students.There will be an application process for the Leadership Cohort and scholarships.The program starts early next year. 1683

This is supposed to be the first week of class for many Washington state schools. But exactly when students in some districts will go to class remains a mystery.Teacher strikes in two districts have already forced the cancellation of classes on their first day of school Tuesday.Evergreen Public Schools are closed because no deal has been reached between the school district and the Evergreen Education Association over salaries.Negotiations are ongoing, and the school district said it will give parents at least 24 hours' notice before classes will begin.The Washougal School District also missed its first day of school Tuesday due to a strike by the Washougal Association of Educators.School district representatives met with union members and mediators Monday to try to reach an agreement on teacher salary increases."The district and the association have worked hard to reach an understanding but, unfortunately, we were not able to come to an agreement," district Superintendent Mary Templeton said.Four other state school districts, which are scheduled to start classes Wednesday, could have those plans derailed by strikes over salaries and benefits.Vancouver Public Schools, Longview Public Schools, Battle Ground Public Schools and the Hockinson School District all announced that negotiations are continuing with teachers and mediators.The Hockinson School District said it's hoping to start classes on time but is asking parents to have backup plans for their children, just in case. 1515

They're called the religious nones--a diverse group made up of atheists, agnostics, the spiritual, and those with no specific organized religion in particular. And over the years, this population has continued to grow, with millennials increasingly driving the growth. "I think many of us are finding connections in spirituality in ways that for our parents would seem quite odd, but for us, feel more relevant and feel more authentic," said Jill Filipovic, a columnist and author of the book OK Boomer, Let's Talk: How My Generation Got Left Behind.A millennial herself, Filipovic considers herself a part of this growing trend."I don't affiliate formally with any of these religious beliefs. I would qualify myself as religious none, even though I'm culturally Christian," said Filipovic. The Pew Research Center found just 27 percent of millennials say they attend religious services on a weekly basis, compared to 38 percent of baby boomers. And only about half of millennials--adults born between 1981 and 1996--say they believe in God with absolute certainty, and only about 1 in 10 millennials say religion is very important in their lives."Millennials, as I said, are relatively progressive people, and the Catholic Church is a formal patriarchy. It's an organization in which women are formally barred from being in positions of power," said Filipovic. The Pew Research Center says religious nones are growing faster among Democrats than Republicans, though their ranks are swelling in both partisan coalitions.But while less religious, millennials are still likely to engage in spiritual practices."It doesn't surprise me to see spirituality on the rise; it's such a key part of the human condition to want to understand why am I here, what is my purpose."The trends are not going unnoticed by religious institutions like the Roman Catholic Diocese of San Diego, which created the Young Adult Ministry to connect young adults to the Catholic Church."That's where we start to cultivate relationships and just bring us all the baggage, bring us all the stuff that you have questions about, and let's just talk about it," said Patrick Rivera, director of Young Adult Ministries.Rivera says before the pandemic, they would hold social events that don't necessarily feel religious."We have Theology on Tap, where we'll go to a bar or a parish hall, we'll bring in our own kegs and speakers and live musicians and have a theological discussion," said Rivera.He says the effort has been a sort of rebranding of the church. "One of the hardest parts for me in the last few years has been the rise of different scandals and things that have come up," said Rivera.Through conversation and social events, he says they're working to connect with marginalized groups like the LGBTQ community, who've historically felt ostracized from the church."That's the issue we want to try and resolve. It doesn't necessarily matter how you enter into faith or community, the community is still there longing to accept you as you are," said Rivera. "Definitely LGBT community is an area that we seek to try to mend some of the damages we've seen done across the previous generation or so from the church."A young adult ministry coordinator, Daniel Godinez, was 27 when he reconnected with the Catholic church."I didn't have the right friendships, I didn't have the right connections, it all came down to a moment of emptiness in my life," said Godinez.Despite having a great job and friends, he says life's pleasures were not fulfilling him. In 2012, an old friend invited him to a church retreat, which Godinez believes was God calling him back home. "It was absolutely tough, not having support from your friends at that moment when you're going through that transition process, I think is probably the toughest thing you can encounter at that moment in life," said Godinez.Godinez is now the Young Adult Ministry Coordinator at Most Precious Blood in Chula Vista and married to a woman he met through the church.Rivera says COVID-19 has impacted the church's ability to reach new people; rather than large gatherings, they must rely on small events to continue outreach. However, Rivera says it's allowed them more opportunities to focus on the one-on-one small-scale relationship model."It's one person at a time for us," said Rivera. 4331

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